WORKING WITH GRIEF

I was grocery shopping yesterday (fantastic feat when you forget you have ALL your soccer equipment in the back of your van when you go to load your groceries), and in the check-out, I saw the newest "People" magazine. One of the featured articles was Holly Robinson Peete discussing her son's autism.

Any time I see an article on a magazine, or on the internet about autism, I always feel compelled to read it. Well I mean minus the research studies (I'm sure all autism parents read those when they publish). But it's more the social stories I'm talking about. Reading about other people in a similar situation as you, talking about their child and their struggles. So you know I bought it and later in the afternoon, sat on my couch and read it. I have to say this: it amazes me how every parent seems to go through the same experience. It doesn't matter who you are, whether you are just the average Joe or a famous celebrity. We all breakdown to the same place, and go through the same emotions: shock, denial, anger... That immediately makes me think of the five stages of grief by Elizabeth Kubler-Ross. For those of you not familiar with this, it is the psychological explanation of the emotional stages when dealing with grief over death. It's always interested me how closely the two scenarios seem to command the same stages of dealing with grief. So my question is: is dealing with the "loss" of your child to autism the same as dealing with the grief of death. Yes I realize this is not a comparison. In autism, you still have your child (this in no way minimizes those who have actually lost a child). I'm specifically talking about the grieving process; not the situation that triggers it. And what I have found is most families I read about seem to go through this process.

When Kierra was first diagnosed, I was expecting it. I knew in the back of my mind months before we even started the evaluation process that this would be the verdict. I tried to emotionally prepare myself as best I could. Still, I was still semi-floored when I skipped through the evaluation papers to the very last page where it said, "Kierra is diagnosed with Austism Spectrum Disorder, mild to moderate range." Maybe it was seeing it in print that made it real. But there it finally was. Of course as soon as everyone left I had a major breakdown. Jarrett strangely went back to work (I think he never truly believed that would be what they told us). And over the next year or so things changed a lot. I was a lot more depressed, upset, angry - trying to bargain with God to give me back my child. And finally I came to accept that Kierra was who she was. However, I did for a long time, mourn the child that I thought I had.

As a parent of autism, it is a hard thing to accept to have a notion that your child is perfect in every way, and to have that rug pulled out from under you. It's difficult to see your baby born and reach all her milestones. To see her thrive and begin to talk. Ah the talking... you know every parent is thrilled to hear first words. I had no clue that I would have to fight to get them back a year later. It is heartbreaking to watch your child slip away and not be able to do anything about it. Such is the disorder: it is cruel.

Don't get me wrong, I accept my daughter for who she is. She is still my sweet girl, and I love her with all my heart. But I'd be a complete liar if I didn't say I sometimes wonder what she would be like without Autism. What stories would she sit and tell me? Who would be her best friend? What's her favorite color? All the things I know about Jenna and Karis are a mystery to me with Kierra. It is hard to live with someone, to love them, and not know entirely what they are all about. I'd also be a liar if I never admitted I grieved for a life for Kierra that she'll never have. That sounds harsh but it's not to undermine her quality of life in any way. I mean I mourn for her ability to live her life simply and without the problems of her disorder getting in her way. At the tender age of 4 (five in a few weeks), I already see the hardships that lay in front of her. Add that with the normal life struggles - it seems unfair. I wish for her the same things in life as my other two daughters: love, happiness, contentment. Those don't seem unreasonable things to ask for.

To answer my own question, parents of autism definately grieve for the loss of their autistic child. It is a process of dealing and coming to terms with a situation we didn't count on. However, it proves to us that our love for our children is boundless. That we struggle through our feelings and rise to the occassion to completely support our children and do what we have to. To be honest, it's not hard to give it your all when you think about all that you give back to your child. It's not a sacrifice when you find something in yourself you never knew you have. Unlimited love, devotion and knowing that no matter what, you would never give up on your kid. Being the parent of autism is a hard thing no doubt about it, but it definately makes you aware of the kind of person you really are. Through all the grief, that is the greatest reward.

THE GREENS: THUMB, MONEY AND ENVY

Oh geesh!!! I have a husband that mean's well but sometimes doesn't do well. I'll explain (I don't want you to think I'm dissing my man!).

A month ago I had told Jarrett that we should buy some weed and feed for the lawn, since we are planning on living here. I'll be honest - last summer we slacked off because we were building the new house and all of a sudden, investing a lot of time and energy into our landscaping seemed like a waste. So we didn't do much and I let the flower beds and such fall by the wayside... BIG MISTAKE!! When we cancelled the contract on the house, all of a sudden we are faced with our year of neglect. One would think not such a big deal... oh nelly let me tell you - big deal!

Our neighbors laugh at us about our landscaping. You see, they knew the guy that built our house (well I use the term "knew" loosely - they didn't get along). I guess he and his wife were a little anal about the landscaping. Case in point - we have a rock garden in the front - and the man would use an eye dropper and a toothbrush to CLEAN the stones. I'm not lying people!!! He'd have a complete coronary if he saw the way I treated it. Yeah yeah, he was also a man without three kids ok!? When we bought the house, the first time I saw the backyard I was completely amazed and impressed. It was like something out of "Better Homes and Gardens". Now it'd be lucky to be featured in "Horrible Homes and Grotesque Gardens". OK maybe not that bad... but it wouldn't be one of those yards you'd go "Oh I wish I lived there!". Plus we did have a dog until Christmas - and those with dogs you know what I'm talking about.

So this is why we are busting our butts now - we are trying to redeem ourselves. And so far so good! I have re-cut the beds (the previous homeowner never put in landscaping edging - the dolt!), laid some sod, pulled out some rock, and other lovely back-breaking labor. And I'm planting some new perennials and what not. I tell you what - this place will be styling when I'm done with it! Holy crap though I digress severely here. Back to my point...

So we've had the bag of fertilizer in the garage for a while now. And since Jarrett hasn't bothered to apply it, we have dandelions now. LOTS of dandelions. I have been systematically hand pulling them out with this tool. Involves a lot of squatting on my part (I'm sure my glutes thank me). But it's arduous - who wants to spend all day doing that? I remind him occasionally in a non-nagging way... but he doesn't get around to it. I mean true, we did get snow last week. But that hasn't stopped the dandelions so that shouldn't have stopped my husband. Then he toyed around with getting a company in to come spray the lawn. That's fine whatever... I mean he wasted money on a bag of Scott's but you know, just get it done. So has he called anyone? NO!!! Now some may ask why didn't I just take the initiative? Well I answer: I wouldn't probably do a good job on my own. I'd be one of those losers that have those stripes on their lawn because they didn't have it covered properly. OR I would tip the little spreader over and have a nice burned out patch on my front lawn. OR I would use too much... I don't know! And to call the guys... Jarrett always wants to know how much, so isn't it easier for HIM to do it?

So long story (long long story) short - I have to get these weeds terminated and soon!! My journey to my lovely yard isn't going to come about until we take care of this little matter! Anyways, back to my green thumb envy!

SHE'S BACK!!!

Whew! What a week! I had a fantastic time, and it's amazing that I didn't have much time to check in here. Must mean I had a really good time right?

My visit with my friend was just awesome!! We spent a lot of great time together chatting, and of course, shopping. We did the sights of the City; the best being the Zoo. I wish we couldn't spent the entire day there, but I had to get the twins back home in time for their bus pick-up. It's so funny - the more things change the more they stay the same. We are both mom's now, and we're different in that we're A) both in our 30's now and B) settled down in commited relationships and with children. However, you put those kids to bed... LOL it's like high school all over again! Well except without the bad henna hair (lol don't ask - it was a bad decision on our parts!) Reminiscing was awesome; you almost forget all the crazy stuff you did together. Some maybe we should put in the vault as we wouldn't want the kiddies to have ammo on us later on!


As it turned out, the baby did get sick, but with something else entirely. She got a head cold. Jenna recovered quickly from her croup and the other two kids got off unscathed. Jarrett has another sinus infection (he sees the ENT doctor tomorrow), and I got something like laryingitis with a little fun stuff to cough up. Honestly, you try to yell at your kids with your voice cracking like a pubescent teenage boy! Why oh why are we always sick?


I have to admit, I'm a little bummed out about being all alone again. You have to remember since I moved out of my house, I've pretty much been alienated from close family and friends. Not because they disowned me, but because I live so far away. I rarely see my family more than three times a year. It's had but it's the decision we made for our future. Having someone with me 24-7 for almost a week... now I'm kinda lonely (cue the violins). I always get in this little funk for a couple of days, and then I swing back into my old routine. LOL I do have to mention that my parents are coming next week so my loneliness will be cured soon. Plus then I get to start all over again when they leave but you know... it's part of the deal. I have to plan the twins' 5 birthday anyways, so that'll keep me occupied. Plus my gardening. Always with the weeds!!

In other news, my dad was told to take time off work. I guess the pressure in his eye built back up again because they stopped his meds. It's fine but he has to take longer to recover. The doctor can't find any damage to his retina so that's good. However, just realized that there was damage to his "other" eye that was never treated. Sheesh can you say malpractice? Nothing will cure that like driving two days to our house, and building a deck. Honestly my dad is nuts. Plus I told Jarrett to watch out, he might accidentally get air nailed or something. Always stay on the left; dad can't see you on the right.

Oh before I forget, Maria asked what IKEA was. OK I know you have IKEA in the States, because I first found it in Chicago when I was living in Indiana. But essentially it is a Swedish superstore. They sell anything house ware related. I laugh when I say it's Swedish for "crap" because most of their stuff is poorly made, but it's good if you are looking for little things. For example, I bought some measuring cups, the kids each a stuffed animal and a kiddie pop tent for them. I wouldn't buy furniture though - it doesn't last long. I should know, I have a cabinet I bought from them years ago. However, it is a major phenomenon among people because you can buy a lot of stuff for a little amount. My friend was in her glory going. We just wanted to make her day. But anyways, I'm sure if you type in www.ikea.com or something, you'll find out more info about it.

Well I should go... back to therapy in the mornings and I'm still in my jammies. Missed ya all and look forward to catching up with all your blogs. K8, thanks for your comments about my kiddos! We think they are cute too! Good luck on your upcoming birth by the way! Can't wait to see pics of your new little guy!

IN CASE YOU MISS ME....

I'm still here! I'm just busy with my company. I have a little time now to jot down a few things:

1. Jenna is feeling much better. She is still a little stuffed up; but definately on the mend. Neither Kierra or Karis got croup.

2. My friend's flight was good. It's great to spend time with her, and her baby is adorable!! The baby has been good so far not getting sick (knock on wood), but we are religiously making Jenna wash her hands.

3. We got SNOW, yes that's right SNOW again!!! Sheesh!!! I planted some flowers two days before. I'll post a picture later of my tulips surrounded by snow. It's something different to see that's for sure!

4. We plan on going to the Zoo and to Ikea this week-end. Jarrett says Ikea means "crap" in Swedish. Eh, that's not far from the truth. But at least it's cheap crap. But Christy doesn't have one where she lives, so we'll take her anyways.

5. I'm babysitting two other kids tonight - SIGH!!! So that will be 6 kids I'll be feeding tonight. I'm only doing it to be nice though - just remember that!!! Besides you never know when you need the favor returned right?

Anyways, that's about all from me!! You miss me yet? I'll be back to my old, posting self again on Wednesday!!

CROUP/TRAVEL UPDATE

My friend is still coming! She talked to her pediatrician that said he didn't think it was something worth cancelling a flight for. Just take precautions as you would with a common cold - WASH HANDS!!!

So I'm going to pick her up in about 3 hours. I'm totally excited! My neighbor will take the twins and feed them lunch and put them on the bus for me. That's going to help out a bunch since of the timing with the flight arrival. The airport is across the City so by the time I get there and back, I'll have to book it to their school without lunches pretty much. This works much better! No one wants a crabby, autistic kid in their class (or a hungry one for that matter).

So I'll be running around like a headless chicken getting last minute things done. Not quite sure why I'm posting actually (I could be folding towels). That's how much I'm addicted to you people! SEE SEE I love you. But anyways, keep fingers crossed we are doing well with illnesses. Jenna got her one shot steriod and she had a great night last night (slept like a log as did I).

Off to clean toilets! Have a great day!

A TOAST OF SORTS

Jenna has croup AGAIN!!! Please God, can we stop with this already? This kid has croup so often. She'll be five years old next month, and she's had it more times than I care to remember. She's had it 3 times this year alone.

The reason it's particularly shitty is because my friend is supposed to come tomorrow with her 10 month old baby! Yes croup can be contagious, although it's mostly a common cold virus that hits certain kids as croup. Jenna is really predispositioned to it (she's A: thin framed, B: has a small windpipe and C: just sucks that way). So Jarrett trucked her to the ER last night at 1:30 am to get her the steroid to decrease the swelling. First thing this morning, I had to call Christy to let her know about what was going on. I told her she didn't have to come if she didn't feel good about it. Our doctor told us as long as we are diligent in washing Jenna's hands, and don't let her kiss on the baby, she should be fine. But I don't want to be held responsible for someone's baby getting ill. So I'm waiting to hear what's going to happen.

I spent about $300.00 on this ticket. It's not the money that bothers me though; I'm just really disappointed about the situation. I mean I know it's not Jenna's fault - it just sucks is all. I've been looking forward to this for almost a month now! We rarely get a chance to visit one another - so this was going to be great. My other two NEVER catch croup from Jenna when she has an episode (knock on wood), but then again, those are MY kids. They live here, they don't have a say in whether they contract it or not.

So anyways, I guess I'll lay in wait to hear the verdict. I have a sneaking suspicion she won't be coming tomorrow after all (can't say I would blame her), but anyways raise your glasses:

To your children and having the most inconvenient bouts of sickness whenever humanly possible!

WHAT'S IN YOUR PURSE?

Mamalee named me in a meme to show and tell everything in my purse. Now, I must warn you, I have a BIG purse which means I have a lot of stuff in it! Some stuff I was even surprised to find in there (most money). So let's begin shall we?

Here is a picture of one of my purses. This would be the one I'm using today. I have about 10 purses, I alternate them frequently. Actually if I looked in all of them, I would find stuff in all 10 of them.


In the front left hand pocket I have two-five dollar bills (Yes this is what fivers look like in Canada), a necklace of some sort, a pink suede change purse, and change that wasn't in the change purse for some odd reason.


In the front right hand pocket I have one Always panty liner, two Tampax tampons, a packet of Certs mints, a cheque from Grandma that I thought I cashed (sorry gma, I'll cash it tomorrow I promise!), a receipt and more change that isn't in the change purse.


In the main compartment, I have Karis' purple purse (she gets annoyed lugging it around but insists on taking it with), a packet of Kleenex, a bottle of Juniper Bath and Body Works lotion, a Tide pen, Listerine breath spray, and some kiddie wipes for dirty faces/hands.


Also in the main compartment, I have sunglasses, Body Shop lip gloss, my cellphone, dental floss, a book of Canadian stamps, a cookie from Boston Pizza, Rimmel face powder, and my red Roots wallet.


In the little pocket inside the purse I have a Disney sticker book that belongs to Karis, a Versace lipgloss, my pink watch, Dentyne gum, a Toys R Us gift card, and a twenty dollar bill (score!).


So those are the guts of my purse. Yes it is pretty heavy, and yes my husband's wallet also goes in there when we go out together (along with his cellphone, and any other crap he decides to stuff in there). I swear it's why I need to go to the chiropractor so often! Since this is a tag meme, and I'm not sure who has all done it, I tag anyone that hasn't done this yet!!

HONESTLY...SNOW IN MAY????

You've read right! Snow... in May... Victoria Day long week-end. Can it get any grosser than this? Oh for those of you in the States, Victoria Day celebrates the old queen's birthday. Yeah those English came here, stuffed their Queen down our throats so she's on all our money, and part of our national anthem duo of songs we sing. What has the monarchy done for us lately though? (Note: please don't throw your loonies at me if you like the Royal family thank-you!)

Me and Jarrett had our whole week-end planned out to be very productive. Sodding, finishing the playstructure, placing deck footings, building the retaining walls and planting my flowers. Too bad we only got one day of decent weather to do anything. Friday we got all the lumber, landscaping stone, sod... anything else landscaping you can think of. We actualy rented a truck for the day to haul. Jarrett had that thing so weighted down, it was 1/2 inch from scraping the axles. I even got my patio set!!! I harassed him enough that he just said "Let's go get one then!" (LOL I like to harass that man... he caves easily!). It's all good, he'll thank me later. However, all we accomplished so far the rest of the week-end was laying the sod and putting down... 6.... count em 6 stones!! It started to profusely hail on us. That was yesterday. We've been in the house ever since.

This morning, we woke up to snow. Snow flurries everywhere! I'm thoroughly disgusted right now. We are stuck in the house. Thank God I didn't plant my flowers like I wanted to on Saturday. They'd be frozen by now I'm sure. They are sitting in my husband's stall in the garage - his car sits in the driveway getting hailed on. Instead we installed a shelf in the spare bedroom closet and are dickering around with other odds and ends in the house. I'm in laundry mode as well - but that's hardly fun. The worst part is Jarrett has tomorrow off too - a major extended week-end; and we didn't get to do anything we wanted. What a waste of days off. I'd go to the mall and do some retail therapy but I'm sure the whole city has the same idea. When stuck indoors - shop!

To top it off, I had my teeth cleaning on Friday and the hygienist was Hitler's long lost great granddaughter I swear! I've never had a cleaning hurt so much in my life! And hey, I take good care of my teeth. They hurt so bad, I could barely chew my food that evening. The next day, my whole jaw hurt. That evil woman!! I'll never let her near me with any dental tool or little cup of fluoride again!!! I'm all for good dental health but seriously - that's just insane! I don't care if I did get a free toothbrush and dental floss out of the deal.

We also learned that our neighbors can be heard on our baby monitor. I guess we have the same one. Anyways, I could hear a kid crying and then said, "Huh, that doesn't sound like Karis". Then I could recognize "A's" whine. We called the neighbor and I could hear their phone ringing. So that means they can hear what WE say on our channel. I also heard her bitching that her husband probably wouldn't bother answering the phone. WE had a good laugh until we realized something - they can probably hear us too. That's not good - LOL we say a lot of shit in this house that no one should be hearing. I mean - you know... lol.

Last but not least, my best pal from high school, Christy, will be here on Wednesday with her baby. I'm totally excited as this is her first visit here. I surprised her with plane tickets to come. We often don't get so visit unless I'm at mom and dad's, so this is a major thing for us! She'll be here a better part of a week, so if I'm a little MIA it's because we're hanging out! I'm sure I'll have pictures to post later. I'm sure it'll be tame; after all we are both mommy's now. Man I could tell you some crazy stories about our teenage adventures...

Well I hope you all are having better weather than us!! Not hard to do that unless you are living in Antarctica or something. Take care!

10 THINGS I LOVE ABOUT MY LIFE

I was tagged by Mommy's Getaway to do a list of 10 things I love about my life. Only ten? Then I thought about it - it's a lot harder than you'd think because you have to find your "top" ten. So giving it some thought; this is what I came up with.

10. I love that I am still close friends with my best friend from high school. I lost contact with a lot of people I used to chum around with. The one person I haven't ever lost contact with is Christy. We've been through some amazing stuff during the past almost 18 years. She's actually coming to visit for a week in a few days and I can't wait to see her. I have a lot of close friends, a lot of whom I think of more like sisters. I think it's great to be able to say you have strong people in your life that you count on, and respect.

9. That I'm able to be a stay at home mom. I hate that people think it's a cop out to be a SAHM; that it's not a meaningful job. Of course it is!! How could it not be?? I'm lucky I get to spend these precious years with my kids. I hope they feel blessed like I did for having my mom at home when I was growing up.

8. That I live in a area that probably provides the best services imaginable for Kierra. To be honest, Alberta is probably one of the best places in North America to be with an autistic child. We have free services, unlimited services, and my child has been thriving ever since!! In the States, she was lucky to get 3 hours of therapy a week. Her she gets more than that in a morning, plus she has a specialized services school for the afternoon. We are fortunate to be here for her.

7. That we have really good people living near us. I know I bitch about neighbors, but two out of the eight are good families (LOL everyone else sucks!). But this is the first time in almost 9 years we have had neighbors we like, get along with and hang out with. It feels good. We usually never live anywhere long enough to cultivate friendships.

6. That I don't worry about money. I hate even saying it, but I have to be honest. It's nice to not live paycheck to paycheck or be house poor. And it's nice to buy things without having to worry about going over budget. I have to admit, we are doing far beyond my expectations of our life style would be at this point.

5. I love my house. LOL I know what you are thinking - why on earth did she want to build last year then? Location and the school mostly. But we've resolved some things about that now. Plus we finished the rest of the house out and I love it!! We get our yard the way we want and it'll be perfect! Just in time for Jarrett to get an offer somewhere else with the company I'm sure!

4. We are all healthy! (knocks on wood). We have been blessed in this department really. In spite of other things that a hardships at least we have our health. I hope we are always lucky in this department.

3. I'm really close to my mom. Growing up, we had a bit of a strained relationship (in my teens actually), but that was a lot in part of mixed ideas of things going on at the time, me and my crazy teenager hormones, and definately my teenage attitude problem. Once I moved out on my own, got married, and had kids - I really understood my mom so much better. Now she's not so much "mom"; she's more like one of the closest friends I ever had, and a total confident. Which I think is great! I hope to have this relationship some day with my own girls.

2. My husband of course! He runs a very tight race with the girls for my affections. He's my best friend, the best husband and everything else in between. I couldn't imagine ever being without him. He is definately my soulmate and I'm truly lucky to have a man like him as my husband.

1. That I have the three most beautiful little girls I could have ever imagined!! It's so funny - I always thought I'd have boys. And then I ended up with girls!! I couldn't imagine my life without them! They are what give me the most joy in my life.


So those are my ten things I love about my life!! I guess since I'm in a tagging position, I tag: Dari, Catwoman and Sunshine.

SUPER BUMBO BABY

I thought this was pretty cute!!!

HOW I MET MY HUSBAND

When I was reading comments from my post on Wednesday (hubby's birthday), Maria asked me to tell the story of how I met my husband. I like telling this story; because it's just not ONE story... it's an actual series of little stories. But if you look at the picture as a whole, you'll see why each little part is significant.

Encounter 1: I had a friend in high school who had an older brother named "S". I was supposedly dating him, but I already knew at this point it wasn't working out. I just had come off of a two-year relationship with this guy I was madly in love with. In a way, I think I was still a little hung up on him. I was looking for any excuse not to spend the night with her brother (sounds sad huh?) and she had a crush on this guy that lived in the next town over. I should mention this was a "rival" town. Any sporting event we played against them was insane!! Don't ask me why, it was just this crazy competition between towns 30 minutes from one another. So when my friend said let's go to this party; I figured sure why not. We get there and it was super boring!!! Since we are rivals, the girls pretty much ignored us. We were the only ones from out of town. The guys were a lot more friendly. I spent most of the party sitting in some old stained chair thinking of ways to break up with "S". We started saying there was this social party for an upcoming wedding back in our town, and we should go. The guys (six of them) were totally hyped! They wanted to go. The girls weren't amused, giving us dirty looks. So me and my friend, and six guys from the town down the highway went back to our town. We partied, we had a blast, at 1:00am I drove all these drunks back home. One guy in particular I found obnoxious. He was this guy with dark hair, blue eyes, and kept hitting on me in his drunken stupor. I told him to beat it; I still technically had a boyfriend. Never gave him another though (so I thought).

Encounter 2: One year later, we're at a friend's party (I partied a lot as a teen!) and some guys again from the next town over came. One was friends of her family. It was winter time and we were all pretty drunk. I decided in a bright moment to go snowmobiling with this friend of mine, who was equally drunk. We got maybe 100 feet from the house, and he hit the bottom of a deep ditch at full speed (which is equivalent to hitting a wall). I actually flew onto him and on the windshield. I cracked 2 ribs (I didn't feel a thing until the next day). Even so, I went on a snowmobile party into the woods the next day. We were all in this cabin talking and low and behold guy with dark hair, blue eyes staring at me. I couldn't figure out where I knew him from at first. Some of the guys were joking with me because my boobs still hurt from the night before (hitting the windshield) and calling me the "chick with the sensitive boobies". This is the same night I meet this guy "R" who I have a huge crush on. I decide "R" must be mine and make it my mission to snag him.

Encounter 3: One month later "R" invites me and my friends to yet another party in his town (same rival town). I'm totally excited because I've always had a thing for "R". He's totally hot and a catch; and he seems interested in me. We get to the party, and "R" introduces us to his three best friends. One of whom is guy with dark hair, blue eyes. I finally get a name now - Jarrett. Jarrett spends the entire night trying to talk to me, which is annoying me because I'm interested in "R". He says he remembers me, I'm the girl with the "sensitive boobies". I find him creepy for some reason, and don't want him pestering me. Jarrett somehow convinces my friend to give him my phone number. I was so mad at her for doing this. Jarrett continues to call me for the next year asking me out on dates. Every time we have a get together with the guys (cause "R" is there), Jarrett is there too. I find him useful because at least he buys me drinks at socials. But I have this on/off again thing with "R" - and I refuse to give up!

Encounter 4: Fast forward one year. We are at the labor day social in our town. This is a big deal, everyone from towns around come to our social. It's a great party with great dancing, friends and a lot of teens illegally drinking. This is the summer I graduate high school. During the summer I was seeing "R" a little here and there, but I was getting annoyed with his immature behavior. I finally wrote him off and thought I was going to start new. For some reason, I start to think about Jarrett. I haven't heard from him in about a month. I'm wondering what's up. Maybe he finally got the hint. I'm annoyed his on my mind at all in fact. At the social, me and my friends are having a good time and who do I see coming towards me? Jarrett. Except he's with this skinny blonde girl. I immediately feel a rush of jealousy. You have to remember I have a big head about him because he's had a very apparent crush on me for over a year, and I thought I had him wrapped around my finger. Now here he is with this girl. We talk a little, and he asks how I'm doing. He tells me he's going back to the States to start his second year university in a few weeks. Asks me what my plans are. Then he says to me, "So if I ask you to dance, would you dance with me?" Me being snarky says, "I don't know, is your girlfriend going to pull out my hair if I do?" He looks at me funny and then looks at the girl and laughs and says, "OHHHHH no we're old friends!! We're more like sister/brother!" I instantly feel dumb; because now he knows I was jealous. He smiles at me cocky and then continues, "So if I dance with you, is your boyfriend going to pull out my hair?" I couldn't help but laugh, so I danced with him. The song (and I still remember) was The Flame. At the end of the evening he tells me that I should call him (which is different), if I want to get together sometime. I say ok. The next night I actually call him and we get together to watch a movie. I learned a lot about him. He played guitar, he was studying to be a civil engineer, he never really dated girls long, and he wore blue contacts. His eyes were really brown.

Our first date... the movie sucked so we went to the backyard at his house. His parents own this house on the river and it's beautiful. He told me he remembered the day he finally knew my name. It was at the party and that he thought I looked beautiful. He told me he remember the outfit I was wearing, the way my hair was. He said he knew he had to know me. I was taken aback. We sat out by the dock and the night was clustered with stars, shooting every which way. We laid on our backs and played this dumb game of claiming stars (whoever called it first). I think if I was one of those people who wishes on stars, I would have had a thousand wishes. Who would know that the same guy I met two years ago in a beat up van... the same guy in a snowmobile shack in the woods, the same guy at a party the next town over... the same guy calling me asking me for a date - would be the man I married.

I have asked people if they believe in fate. Some say yes and others no; and there are people who aren't sure what to believe. If you are one of those that aren't sure, or don't believe let me say this: I met a boy that I continuously ran into never knowing he'd be a significant person in my life. I never had any interest in him, but he didn't care; he kept trying to win my heart. Something kept telling him I was something special, even if I never thought I was. He didn't really know why he wanted to be with me, but he never questioned it. That night under the stars, I finally felt it too. The night I finally opened my heart to thinking about him in a different way. I finally got to know him and in just doing that I "knew" he was it. He was the "one". I was never so sure of anything in my life. And if felt comforting and real. It felt complete. Soon after, we realized all our encounters over the years, and the forces that kept bringing us back together. He was the man I would marry and have babies with. How could that be anything but fate?

I was showered with wishes under a magical sky one night. Wishes that came true with a boy with dark brown hair and brown eyes.

THERE WAS AN OLD WOMAN...

When I Am an Old Woman

Jersey Mum tagged me with this meme. I thought this one was different. My great-grandmother passed away 3 years ago at 101. She was spunky to the end. My grandma's are both in their 80's and still have their wits about them. They've all had interesting lives. We have a long line of longevity in our families... so that's a lot of years of cool talks (and some strange ones as well).

When I am an old woman, I hope to:

A) Still have my mind. I don't want to be one of those senile old ladies that drives everyone bonkers. Plus it would be nice to recollect people I know, or think fondly on old memories. And I don't want to walk out of the nursing home wearing my bra for a top.

B) Have family who will still talk and visit with me. I have this fear that people will not visit me and I'll be alone. LOL you know how it is; people get tired of you and don't really want to visit you. I don't want to be sitting there everyday staring out of a window watching birds and wondering if my family remembered I turned 103 today.

C) Have bladder control. LOL seriously - I don't want to be pissing myself! Besides, sometimes those nursing homes aren't all that good about keeping you clean. All I ask is the ability to sit on the toilet and go by myself.


When I am an old woman, I will not:

A) Come up with strange ideas about digestion, how to take medication etc... that make no logical sense and makes my family roll their eyes all the time. I will not act like medical science hasn't evolved and that using leeches to drain the evil from my boy is an acceptable practice.

B) Recycle presents from things in my own home. I know people that do this; it's just not right. If all else fails, grandma will give out cash. No one will receive one of my salt and pepper shakers, or a sweater from 1990 that I wore in high school. Although being vintage - that actually might be a cool gift.

C) Drive like I own the road just because I'm older. I hate it when old people insist that they've put in their time so they can drive any way they want. They say teens drive crazy... HA I've been on the road with the old folks! I also refuse to fart in public and act like it wasn't me. That always throws me for a loop. I mean we're standing right there. Do we really not notice this?

OK so I'm supposed to tag some people. I guess I'm going to tag MamaLee, Janis, and Maria. And anyone else that wants to play, play along!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY JARRETT!

Today is my darling husband's birthday! Happy Birthday Jarrett!! He is a whole 33 years old. I don't think that's old - however the grey hairs on his head haven't been informed of this yet. He has a bum knee that also missed that memo. Oh well - he's still a very handsome fella!!

I was thinking about all the birthday's that we've shared together. We started dating when hubby was 19 years old (I was almost 18). We spent the first three years living in different countries - but always spent his birthday's together. The two years after that, I got brave and went to university in the States (well and to be with him as well). Then we got married, he graduated grad school, we bought a house... and you know the rest of the story. Life goes on and it's a beautiful thing!

So many things have changed over the years since we've started celebrating birthday's together. I don't have the body of a teenager anymore, my hair color is different, I have stretch marks now. We also don't live in our tiny beat up trailer anymore and have upgraded to a house of more than 4000 square feet. If someone would have told me this 8 years ago - I would have laughed at them!! We have a minivan - which is something I vowed I'd never buy (hey I didn't know how great they really were ok?). We've moved more times in the past 9 years than most people (on last count 5). We've definitely been through some tough times; but we always managed to get through them. It pulled us together rather than pulled us apart. We've shared some unbelievable times as well; and those are the ones I cherish. He's my total match in this world. There is no one that would appreciate my strange brand of behavior, or could act like a complete nut with me the way he does. There is no one on this earth that could make me feel as special as he does everyday. He's been my best friend for 14 years, my husband for almost 9, and the father of my three beautiful girls!! There is no gift I could buy and top with a bow that could match the gifts he's given me over the years: love, friendship, laughter and completely contentment.

So Happy Birthday hon!!! I love you with all my heart!

SEARCHING HIGH AND LOW

I usually pride myself as being a somewhat organized person, with the major exception of my office. I don't file things away. NEVER. Don't ask me why. Well maybe it's jut not limited to the office. I have issues in other areas of the house too. Laundry is done and folded, just usually not put in drawers. HEY you haul it up two flights of stairs!!! And maybe... well sometimes I don't clean out the fridge every week like I probably should. There I've said it; I'm not perfect!!! Then again, I'm sure you weren't under the illusion I was anyways ;) And if you are orchestrating that you are... you're just fibbing!

Me and my husband are procrastinators too. We have a Little Tykes play center that is meant for smaller children that we've been meaning to list online - for over a year now. Now that we have a partially assembled new one in the backyard, probably high time we did something about it. We also have that stove that quit working a few months back that was in my office until last night. We finally listed them online. The stove free to go to whoever will take it off our hands (or we're taking it to the dump); the play center we're holding out for a good price. Last night we got calls for both. The play center is supposed to be picked up tonight. I'm not sure what's going on with the stove. Either way, I'm rid of both of them soon I hope.

So last night we hauled the stove into the garage as well as the pieces for the play structure. The only thing left to find are the swings, the main bolt and the instructions with the tie downs. The bolt... LOL you'd think we'd put that somewhere we could find it. We looked everywhere - it was driving us nuts looking for it. Finally I had an epiphany and went to the laundry room and low and behold, it was in this small plastic container. I remember seeing it from painting a few months back. I had no clue what it was, until I saw the similar piece on the new structure. The swings: I find ONE of the two swings, plus we decided to give away one of the baby swings as well. But where is the other swing? It's never even been used (the original swings). You'd think they'd be together but apparently not! We are still searching for it. Hopefully it's in the garage with the instructions for assembly and the tie downs. Who knows... but this gives you an idea that we aren't really as organized as I thought. Now our real problem is when we move (which is quite often) we never FULLY unpack everything. I know, I know - odd. But there are just boxes by the end of the move that we never get to. We figure if we haven't missed it for 2 years, we don't really need it anyways. That kinda backfired on us this time. Where or where is that swing?

On other news, my dad is being released from the hospital. They didn't do the surgery (which is good) because the medication got his eye pressure down. The CAT scan didn't show any obvious damage, but that doesn't rule out possible problems. At this point we'll take what we can get. He still has a hard time seeing anything out of the one eye, and still has floaters in the other. I guess only time will tell. He's already talking about going back to work, and coming out the first week of June to help build our deck. Honestly... you could cut off both his arms and he'd try to hammer with his mouth. Why do men insist on never taking the proper time to recover?

Today is a busy one: I have therapists for Kierra, I have to buy some clematis plants for the lattice work, get some more work done in the backyard, and it's soccer tonight!! Can I get a woot woot? Plus it's hubby's birthday tomorrow. I have to buy him a present! Not to mention a new memory stick for the new camera that wouldn't take my old memory stick. Catch ya on the flip side!

WEEK-END OF INTERESTING TWISTS

I promise you a post today of interesting twists. This is my life we are talking about... I can't be anything but unpredictable.

Friday we picked up the materials for the kids playscape. Our two buds came and helped Jarrett unload it all (which is good because I don't want to haul it into the backyard). I was the foreman: I drank my Slurpee and commented how good a job they were doing. After we sat around yapping on our driveway. My friend had her wisdom teeth extracted that morning and came outside to talk with all of us - extremely high from her vicodin talking about writing on her leg. Don't ask... she was medicated remember? I should also mention the twins didn't have school Friday. It was inservice day; and I had originally promised the Zoo; only to remember there was a therapist coming. Whoops - mommy's bad!!!! The more time I could unwind outside with them nestled inside in their beds the better!!

Saturday, we spent the entire day outside trying to assemble aforementioned playscape. FUN!!! How else can you explain sitting outside holding up huge pieces of plastic when your uterus is convulsing with cramps and you wish you could die on the grass? It's just one of those days you wish you could grab your ovaries and throw them down a cliff. Being a woman sucks sometimes. My dear husband was trying to be understanding: as I complained constantly that I hurt and that I wanted something salty. We were almost finished (only 6 hours later), when we figured out we were shorted two large bolts, only to be given two others that we didn't need. Little Tykes, if you are reading this: YOU SUCK!!! Is it that hard to put the proper hardware in the box? You can charge me $1,200.00 for a playstructure, but you can't include the proper hardware to assemble it? Not to mention your crappy wordless instructions that must've been designed by someone addicted to crack. Needless to say, the girls were very disappointed that we couldn't finish it. So they have part of it up; just not the swing set.

The funniest part of the day was Jenna came up to me and told me, "Mommy I really appreciate you," and gave me this huge hug and kiss! That was so sweet and my heart melted. She then continued, "Daddy I don't appreciate you though." LMAO!!! We asked her why and she said, "Because it's mother's day tomorrow and you need to appreciate your mommy's!" Hmmm well said! Jarrett pointed out that it doesn't hurt to appreciate the guy that spent his entire Saturday assembled plastic bits. Touche!

Sunday morning, we went to brunch with two other family's. Since my friend (same one with the wisdom teeth) has kids that get up at 5:30 in the morning, she made brunch earlier than me and the other mom would've liked. I mean it wasn't heinously early but early enough that we didn't really get a mother's day sleep-in (unless you consider an extra 1/2 hour sleeping in - I don't by the way!). Who wants to eat bacon when they have holes in their gums? Apparently her: she was a trooper!! I've never seen anyone with faster turnaround after a surgery. The girls jumped on me and the bed, gave me my cards, which included a gift certificate for a one hour hot stone massage!! WOOT, can I get a WOOT!? We went to brunch, Kierra ate probably six pigs worth of bacon, Jenna complained about unproportionate amounts on plates and eyed my chocolate covered strawberry (HEY I gave each kid one!), and Karis just ate and smiled like a hyena. I had an omelet that made me ill, and some sausages that were rather "different". After we went to Best Buy where Jarrett bought me a new digital camera (my old one's LCD screen died on me. I could see the pictures I was taking, or do a review, or see movie clips - so useless basically). So now I have a new one!! Except my memory card won't work in the new one so I have to go buy one of those now. Oh well. Then we went to Home Depot to buy the bolts that Little Tykes (YOU SUCK!) didn't bother to give us. I also bought some petunias. Hey don't look at me that way... I need them I really do!

When we got home, there was a message on the machine from my sister. She informs me dad is in the hospital. I'll be honest, I thought for sure heart attack. Sad huh? He's 57 but he's a workaholic, eats like crap, never exercises, is always stressed out - and he loves it! But it wasn't a heart attack. Instead he decided to use the wench from his truck to pry out the sump pump for the pool because he wanted to reset it. Don't ask why - my father has strange ideas. So anyways, he had the line taunt, pulling it ... and it let loose and the hook hit him square in his left eye. It knocked him out, and when he woke up, he was blind in both eyes. After 10 minutes, he could see out of one eye only. So off to the hospital - he was also alone when he did this. My sister says he has severe pressure on his eye, it's swollen and distended, and completely black. The doctors can't even see into it to determine damage. So far, the pressure has come down somewhat, and he can see blurry shapes, but not see colors. He might have to have eye surgery to relieve the pressure. I just have to say: it would be my dad that would damn near knock out his own eye trying to pull out a sump pump. I will also say he only did this because my mom went to grandma's. Had she been there, he would have never did that. Let this be a lesson: if it's not a good idea when your wife is at home; it's not a good idea PERIOD!!!

Anyways, that's about all from me. I will report anything new with dad as I hear it. I do hope you all had great Mother's Days!!!!! Here's hoping next year will provide a lot less drama though!

HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY

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WHAT MOTHER'S DAY MEANS

For me, this week-end is a time of reflection. I'm coming up on my fifth Mother's Day on Sunday. How can it be my fifth one already? Time goes much too fast. It makes me wonder how my own mother feels. To me, like many of you moms, this is a special day. It's not because we get to sift through all the little handmade pictures, cards and do-dad's from school our kids made. It's not the extra half-hour sleep I'll get on Sunday morning, or even the brunch with friends. It's the fact I get to celebrate this day at all.

Seven years ago, I wasn't sure I'd ever get to have children. We were undergoing years of infertility struggles and painful rounds of in vitro fertilization. We failed twice with the IVF, and I was about to give up. My heart was repeatedly broken every month. I felt a hole that I didn't know how to fill. Ever since I was a little girl, all I ever wanted to do was be a mommy. The thought of not realizing that was devastating to me. Add the financial and physical hardships of the IVF - I was pretty low. To make matters worse, everyone around me was pregnant: friends, family. It felt so unfair that something we wanted so bad just wasn't happening for us. Our second round failed a week before Mother's Day. That was very bitter for me, especially since our first round failed two days after Christmas. I was beginning to think holidays were just bad luck for me to pee on a pregnancy test. Little did I know that same May that left me in tears was the same May I got an unknown Mother's Day gift. It was the month Kierra and Jenna were created.

Now for those of you not on the up and up about IVF, if you have left-over embryos, you freeze them for future use. That way you don't have to go through the entire process again. So that following October, after everyone convinced me to try one more time, we thawed them out and gave them a shot. I was pretty much at my breaking point and had even yelled at our reproductive doctor that I didn't believe him anymore when he said he felt we would be successful. I knew that the chances of conceiving with the frozen embies was less likely, because of possible damage due to cryopreservation. When the did the transfer, I felt indifferent. I refused to get wrapped up in the hype of it all. Even signs of a possible pregnancy I dismissed as being symptoms of the progesterone shots. Low and behold, on my birthday I finally got my greatest wish answered - two lines!! Not only was this the best birthday I could have ever asked for, I also got my Mother's Day miracle five months late.

The following May, I was still eight months pregnant with the twins. I spent that Mother's Day with extremely swollen legs and feet, but happy nonetheless!!! I had my baby shower, and I was on top of the world!! Less than a month later, I welcomed my miracles girls into this world! The next eleven months for me couldn't have been better. I mean yes I had a horrible birth with them, and then had problems afterwards health-wise - but that didn't take away from the fact that every morning I walked into a room with two sets of beautiful eyes and chubby faces waiting to see me and get their kisses!!! Fast forward one year, I got another pregnancy test ON Mother's Day that was also positive!! Cue the 9 month wait for Karis! Now that was an interesting Mother's Day! Eleven month old twins and pregnant again! We weren't sure whether to laugh or just be in shock! We chose to laugh!

When I think back on those days, you'd probably be interested to know it still hurts a little. Even in spite of overcoming it all. Because I sometimes think how easy it could have been to not turned out this way at all. To think I might not have these gorgeous girls in my life - it's unthinkable and unspeakable. I don't know why my path to motherhood was hard. Maybe it was so I would have a greater appreciation for the gift it was. Perhaps it was to learn that things in life can't always be easy. That the things you want most in life are the things you work the hardest to achieve. I thank God for the blessings in my life every day. It's not only a day to celebrate sweet little hands and faces that we love with every ounce of our being. It's a celebration about realizing what life is all about.

This Mother's Day, I encourage all you moms to take a moment. Absorb your life and ask yourself what this day means to you. Let your hearts fill with the love and pride you feel. And remember: this is a day to celebrate the miracle of being a mom.

WELCOME TO ANNOUNCEMENT CENTRAL

First off, let me start by saying I'm a really crappy sister!! I totally forgot to tell everyone that last Friday, my sister's beau proposed to her!! They are getting married this September the 15th. Yes very short notice and no - not a shotgun wedding. This is going to be my sis's 2nd marriage. Her first husband was a total waste of skin (I don't mind saying this; it's a lot less mean that what I'd really like to say). Seriously though, "D" is an amazing guy and I hope he and my sister will be happy together. I'm even happier for her three children, who are finally getting the father figure they deserve!

I'd also like to mention I'm not her matron of honor this time. They are only have one attendant each, and she picked her best friend (person responsible for introducing her to D). I can't complain too much I guess. I was her MOH for her first wedding - to the loser. Now if I knew I'd only get asked once, I would have held out for the good bro-in-law! Oh well. And another interesting development: he's also an enginerd. My dad is a chemical engineer, my hubby (among other degrees) has a degree is civil engineering. My bro Rob is going to be a geological one, and "D" is a civil as well. Can you say neurotic, boring, structured conversations at family get-togethers? Thank God I'm around to spice things up huh? ;)

So my darling Karis is on day 3 of operation "panty wear". She's always been against them (scary huh?); not sure why. She's been using the potty for ages now, but never wanted to give up the pull-up. I figured no point in pressuring her. The other day she announced she wanted to wear panties!! The first day NO ACCIDENTS! The second day, one little one, and as I said - we are onto day 3!! We are very excited now. Three kids - all done with diapers and the like!! Time for a new one huh? ;)

I'm in the process of phone stalking Toys R Us. They are getting in this huge play center to their store (only one) and we are trying to buy it before someone else does. Every day we call the store to see if it arrived. We are a fun consumer to deal with let me tell you. Hopefully we'll get it by the week-end. The girls are super excited. They outgrew their older one, so it's time to step it up a notch and get that backyard rocking with some nice play gear. Besides... it'll keep them out of my hair as I spent countless hours weeding and picking bones out of my gardens. Ya ya, I know it's getting old... but seriously BONES????

In other news, Kierra said her first sentence yesterday!! This wouldn't seem like a major thing, but when your child loses speech, and then takes years to regain it - it's a big deal! She and Jenna will be five next month. Anyways the sentence goes (mumbled but albeit a sentence), "Mum mum, I want a cracker." Glorious!!!! I tried calling hubby (in a business meeting), then my mom (who knows where) and finally settled on the in-laws. Hey I had to tell someone! They were seriously happy!

Well that's about it from me today. I have to go buy groceries - because we are living on baking soda and ketchup right now. Just kidding - but not far from the truth! Hope you all enjoy your days. Some of you ... please remember to go pick up your kids at school. I'm not naming names - you know who you are ;) .

LURKERS BEWARE!!!

I will sic my lurker-detecting tiger on those of you that don't fess up to enjoying the naughty pleasure of this blog!

Just kidding...

I thought it'd be nice for those of you that like to come for a read to post a line or two and introduce yourselves!! If you think enough to come read about my life, I'd love to get to know you! So please feel free to drop in and drop a line! I've gotten to know many of you and have enjoyed meeting all of you!!

A TYPICAL TUESDAY

Forenote: Hey Slick - I'm in Canada!! My 8:00am isnt' your 8:00 am you know!! Sheesh!! For the record I do get up at 7:30 am Mountain Time. But hey, nice to know you sit and wait patiently for my posts LOL.

So I've decided someone is stealing the flat stones in my front yard from around my tree. I have this flower bed in my front yard with a tree in it. The previous owner used this black flat stone to make it. It's not very stable, but I figure as long as you aren't dancing the cha-cha-cha on it; it's fine. Well lately I've noticed that the top row is starting to go missing. I thought ok, I'm just being strange. Then my neighbor mentioned that I must be using that stone in the backyard or something. OK so I'm not crazy!! WHO would go through the trouble to come into my yard at night, and steal my stone? We are actually going to transfer it all to the backyard. I'm making this rock garden with it by insetting it into the ground and planting purple Elysium there. I thought it would be pretty. Besides it's generally mucky in that area. Well I better haul that stone away before I'm left with two rocks. I swear: fish bones, irresponsible child watchers... stone thief's.

I kicked Jarrett out of the garage yesterday (no he doesn't sleep there - I meant his car). I bought a crap load of flowers yesterday but it's still not safe to plant them yet. We are still subject to frost now and again. It's not completely unheard of to get a little snow still either. Sigh - gross huh? When I lived in Indiana, I would've had everything in the ground by now. So Jarrett drives up last night, opens the door and low and behold, I have a greenhouse in his stall. He just came in the house and looked at me. What else can he do? Let hundreds of dollars of flowers die so his shiny car can be indoors? I promised I'd have them out in two weeks. I've also decided my landscaping chores are harder than I thought. I've been doing a lot of hoeing (LOL with the garden tool) and my back is just sore. I went to bed at 9:30 last night - sheesh I'm getting decrepit!

Last night was soccer night. Kierra and I had a tiff over the green jersey I insisted she wear. Mostly because it was team picture night and she wasn't going to wear her polka dot shirt. She screamed for a good 10 minutes. Good thing she's cute. At the field, Jenna sat and moped. She's still a slow runner so she doesn't keep the ball very long. I tried to encourage her but there was no way around her bad mood. Kierra didn't want to play. She sat on my lap most of the time... and proceeded to spill cherry juice box on the white part of her jersey before pictures. GREAT!!! I didn't poke Karis in the eye this week - I figured her cornea could use the rest from my prying fingers. OH but this is odd: one of the kids on the other team got the ball taken from him... no biggie it would seem... and then proceeded to collapse on the ground like a ton of bricks. I figured tantrum and all of a sudden the mother screams "He's holding his breathe!" She and the grandma coming running across the field to this kid (who is actually no more than 3 feet from where I'm sitting), and scoop him up. The mother is freaking out, and the grandma is saying he'll pass out if he doesn't breathe. The mother is blowing in his face. OK I have to say it... this is a trick BABIES do. No one holds their breath until they die. He was having a tantrum and basically whenever he doesn't get his way holds his breath til he passes out. I say let him knock himself out (no pun intended). The only reason he does it is to get attention. The mom ran off the field saying, "It's ok mommy's got you" and a bunch of us parents raised an eyebrow and looked at each other. She rocked this kid for 10 minutes - he's five by the way. Honestly; I think if you looked closely; you'd see the umbilical cord still attached to those two.

So pictures were ok, except they were at the community center which houses a paddle boat pond, a wading pond and a kick ass playground. It was already past their bedtimes, so I said no to the playground (mean mommy). But the security gate to the center was locked. No one could get out!!! People were trying to scan their cards, nothing! Finally after 10 minutes, I said "I'm going through the clubhouse". Another parent told me I couldn't since they had a yoga class up there. Screw that - I'm not sitting around while someone is doing the lotus position and my kids are tired. We went up, said "excuse me the door is broken so I'm using this one" and then about 80 kids and parents traipsed through their class. I'm sure a few men appreciated seeing skinny ladies in spandex. Who knows, maybe even a few wives.

So there you have it. I swear my mundane life does have it's interesting points. Today I'm back outside. I'm doing more archaeological survey to find out the source of the bones. I'm still not sure if it's a chicken...

EVERYDAY'S MOTHER'S DAY GIVEAWAY!

I found this link on Mamalee's page - and as soon as I read it, I HAD to enter myself too!! Everyday is going to give one lucky mommy a free blog makeover!! So for those of you like me, who couldn't design a blog to save her life, check it out!!! Good luck to everyone that enters! The random drawing is this Sunday, May 13th.

POKER NIGHT, LANDSCAPING FIGHTS, CHILD RUNNING AWAY FRIGHTS

Oh what a week-end!!

Friday night started off with a movie rental from Blockbuster, "Bobby". I have to say it; I was greatly disappointed with this movie. I heard a lot of hype about it, and it had an amazing cast of actors. But honestly - it was boring. I understand it was somewhat a biography of his life, meshed in with other people who were affected by it. It was long; and it was boring. There I said it!! LOL.

Saturday, I was a "single parent" for most of the day. Jarrett's sleep in is on Saturday, then he had a dentist appointment and a chiropractic appointment. By the time he was home, it was past 2:00 pm. After that we went to Home Depot, because I told him I needed some tools to tackle the backyard projects we have this summer. When we decide to re-landscape; we don't do it little. Everything we do is grade-scale for some reason. Tsk, tsk - you'd think we'd learn by now. In any case, I spent part of Saturday hand tilling a flower bed and digging out overgrown grass. FUN!! The cous de gras for the girls was the birdbath - which I had promised we'd buy. Nothing like setting up a birdbath on uneven ground. I'm trying to tell Jarrett to get my retaining wall bricks so I can use the flagstones to make a rock garden and set the birdbath in the middle. He's obsessed with the deck extension.
Saturday night we had a couple's poker game. I made a major error on the third hand into the game, and lost most of my chips. After going all in, I pulled off a huge pot, so I was back in. I was the third last out. The person who beat my full house had four of a kind - and she didn't know her hand beat mine until I pointed it out. It seems wrong that someone that needed a cheat sheet for hands won $120.00.

Sunday, we ran to the mall to order the big play structure for the girls. Hopefully that will be in sometime this week. The girls are going to be thrilled. We have to put it together, so I'm not so thrilled. But at least it'll keep them busy. I spent the rest of the day with my garden weasel (no that's no my husband, it's a gardening tool), turning over a flowerbed that we are going to partially sod over to make way for the play structure. It's the lowest lying area, so tons of water was collecting in there. As I did this hard labor, my husband was in front watching the kids ride bikes and what not. At one point, one of our neighbors came out with his kid, and Jarrett mysteriously got stuck watching her as well. After a while, his wife came over so we could go over the trees I want pulled out (we have so many trees in our yard - it's obscene). We decided whoever wanted them could have them - they just have to dig em up. I then noticed the husband over at our next door neighbors sitting on the driveway drinking beer. I'm thinking Jarrett is in their backyard three doors down, why isn't the husband with him???? Apparently he told Jarrett he was coming over to look at the trees. He never even came into the backyard. He just plopped himself down on a lawn chair and boozed it up. I thought that was a little ignorant. Just ditch your kids and don't say anything to the other person.

It gets better... At one point, Jarrett had to get the chicken for dinner prepped for the BBQ. Jenna was playing with friends, Karis was in the house napping, and Kierra was riding her bike out front. There are now six adults (not including Jarrett) in the neighbors driveway. Jarrett asks if they can keep an eye on Kierra; and they say sure. He's inside the house for 15 minutes. He later comes into the backyard where I'm working and tells me I need to watch Kierra. I'm thinking, "why, don't we just have a bunch of people out front?" He tells me that Kierra had ran down to the stop sign before someone figured out she ran off. NICE!!! My kid could've been hit by a car, and they are all sitting around, drinking and discussing quality of life. Needless to say, I wasn't impressed. I guess I shouldn't be surprised: they don't even want to watch their own kids, what made us think they'd watch ours? After that, I made Kierra come in the backyard with me. I pretty much knocked off after that. Can't much work done with her around.

Anyways, that was my week-end. We are supposed to get a nice batch of weather this week so I plan on spending most of the afternoons outside trying to get some stuff done. And don't worry, I bought sunblock.

OUR BEAUTIFUL GIRLS

I just got our pictures back from a photo session two weeks ago. They are the twins (Kierra and Jenna) 5 year old pictures. Plus I had to get some of the two of them together, and one of the three kids. I think they turned our beautifully!!!

If you missed Karis' pictures, go to March 2007, you'll find them there!

EVERYONE LOVES CHOCOLATE!

LOL this one is for Slick, because he asked me what condoms tasted like. I assure you I don't know. But some of these ladies might! Enjoy!

WON'T YOU BE MY NEIGHBOR?

I think of all the people that share these horror stories about their neighbors. I haven't had much trouble really. I once had a neighbor that was so competitive that he'd ALWAYS cut his grass 1/4 inch shorter than mine. Didn't matter if he cut it the day before. It was very odd. I've also had a neighbor who shot his shotgun during 4th of July (we lived in Indiana - apparently this is normal). And I had a neighbor in university that streaked on a bike through our neighborhood. That was ... interesting. But I don't have "horror" stories per say. I do have some grievances though I'd like to share.

1) Crappy little dog two doors down who's owners let it out and bark for 15 minutes at midnight. Wanna hear something funny? Once the dog barked for 30 minutes and we looked outside and could see the owners just standing by the sliding deck door the ENTIRE time. Dog is barking it's face off, it's 10pm. Finally he lets it in and Jarrett starts to yell at him from our deck. The guy tells him he had company. So excuse me; that is a reason to let your annoying dog bark for half an hour? We hate this dog. If something unfortunate happened to him; we wouldn't be saddened. We do have a noise ordinance here after 10:00pm.

2) Crappy big motor home parked in our culdesac never leaves. Imagine this ugly thing that just sits there on the side of the street, looking heinous, and taking up much of the mobility of the area we live in. The City barely ever comes by and issues him a ticket. You are not allowed to park on the street or in your driveway. It's hard to see oncoming traffic and it's hard for oncoming traffic to see our kids playing and riding their bikes. Not to mention any delivery truck or bus can't get around this thing. If this motor home was mysteriously stolen and driven off a cliff somewhere, the neighbors would rejoice. The only reason we don't say anything is because the owner is crazy! We all hate it by the way.

3) My back neighbor likes to fry fish on her deck in a deep fryer. Apparently she doesn't like the smell of it in her house. But whether or not I do doesn't seem to be an issue for her. Swear to God true story: at 11:30 at night we were lying in bed and could all of a sudden smell fish. We looked at each other and then looked out our window. Here she was, having a fish fry on her deck!!! Of course we don't have central air, so we had to have the windows open in order to not completely fry ourselves to death. Nothing more gross than lying in bed smelling oily, stank fish.

4. Neighbor on one side of me keeps throwing chicken bones into my yard. I'm not sure why this is. I've never seen them do it, but it's hard to believe it's anyone else because of where I find them. At least I think they are chicken bones...

5. We have a plastic garbage cans for putting our garbage in. We do this to prevent the magpies from tearing open the bags and spreading the garbage around. Apparently this logic isn't shared since everyone else has plastic garbage bags. So there is always garbage everywhere. It's gross.

6. I found a fish spine in my backyard last week. Take a guess as to who it came from. I chucked it back onto her lawn (that oily fish frying skank).

7. Another neighbor two doors down owns a taxi company. He always has a spare taxi in his driveway in case of breakdowns in the middle of the night. So why does he "hang" it off the end of the driveway instead of on his actual driveway? It makes it impossible for us to back out properly (remember the culdesac).

8. We get all the garbage collected in our yard. We are the back of the culdesac, and for some reason, all garbage collects against my house. I have found a discarded g-string, numerous food and beverage containers, used condoms (ew ew ew), newspapers, fliers... you name it. I'm sick of being the resident garbage dump.

You might think I hate my neighbors and they all hate me. Believe it or not, my immediate next door neighbor is my best friend (even though her four year old son pisses all over the place outdoors - kinda gross), and we also have good friends three doors down. Maybe I just like to complain. But I figured I might as well get it off my chest. I feel so much better!

CHINESE FREEZE TAG

I got tagged by Teri on this one.

This is a game called Chinese Freeze Tag. What are the rules, you wonder? Well then, allow me to explain. What you are about to read are ten - hopefully - interesting facts and/or habits of mine. After you are done reading you will find a list of ten people in no specific order. These are the names of the innocent bystanders whom I have tagged and thus drawn into this game. They will then be forced to write their own blog listing ten interesting facts about themselves, and also select another ten people to tag - No Tag Backs! Very simple, hopefully interesting. Now, sit back, relax, and be amazed.”

1. When I was 17 years old, I won a dance contest. These three girls who thought they did better than me took out an add in the local town's newspaper to argue that I shouldn't have won. In the end, they just looked like a bunch of jealous idiots.

2. The day me and hubby started dating, got engaged, and got married is the same day - the 24th.

3. I did in vitro fertilization to get pregnant with my twins. We did three rounds; the first two failed, and I got lucky on number three. My third baby was a total fluke. We got pregnant with her when the twins were 10 1/2 months old.

4. I was a crappy student in high school and barely passed to graduation. I couldn't get into any secondary institute. Three years later I got into a university by passing the ACT's with flying colors. I then proceeded to get Dean's and President's Honor Lists every semester and graduated Summa Cum Laude. Talk about sticking it to those people who called me dumb in high school!!!

5. I used to really bite my nails alot but all of a sudden stopped. I haven't done it since.

6. I am the oldest of three kids. I have a younger sister and a younger brother.

7. I probably said this before... I've been writing a novel for a while now. It's kinda a psychological thriller. I am severely protective over it and only one person has ever read it. It is my hope to finish it one day and have it published.

8. My parents are wealthy but we do not take hand-outs from them.

9. I got my first period in Canada's Wonderland on a family vacation. I was totally mortified and embarrased and my whole vacation sucked!!

10. I knew I was going to marry Jarrett the first time we had a date. I know that sounds really crazy - but it's true. We've been married almost 9 years, and together for 14.

I have no clue who was tagged, so you're it if you're reading this and never did it yet!

HE DOESN'T BEND IT LIKE BECKHAM APPARENTLY

Game on!!!! We had week three of soccer. This time I came sporting my Guess sweatpant capris and pink hooded sweatshirt - cause you know... ahem ... it helps me support my kids. LOL ok whatever, I just can't do grungy sweats. I got myself a nice canvas chair to park myself in, and brought Karis' folding buggy chair so she could sit on the sidelines and keep me company. Things are going much better. Kierra still won't wear her jersey, but that's ok. Half the kids don't want to either. She actually went to the next field and ran across to the baseball field. I ran after her yelling for her to come back. I was terrified she'd get a fly ball in the head. When I grabbed her hand I thought she was chewing on something so I told her to spit it out. She hawked this big ole loogy in my hand. Apparently she wasn't chewing on anything. Nice hand of saliva later...

The sidelines: where all the parents gather round to clap and offer words of encouragement to their preschoolers who don't seem to grasp the concept of a foot connecting with a soccer ball. Thank goodness for shin guards is all I have to say. But you know, we all take it in stride and constantly remind ourselves that this hour is more about our amusement of our children's lack of coordination, and also to plum tucker them out so they sleep like the dead later on. We clap when our teams scores, we clap when the other team scores, we clap when our team scores on themselves. Honestly, how can you not???? Besides, we are just trying to instill sportsmanship right? They are trying their darnedest.

Apparently not for one fellow soccer dad. He has three little boys all under the age of five playing on the same team as our twins. As the kids were playing, two of his kids kept coming back to him, either crying, pouting or just plain bored of the game. At one point, one of his little guys came off the field looking ready to burst into tears and I heard the father yell, "Stop acting like a girl and go play!"
NICE!!! Why do men feel that comparing a boy to a girl when he's not excelling at something is justifiable? What message does this send to his sons? That girls are less than boys? That boys aren't allowed to feel sad, disappointed or bummed out? I actually turned and looked at him; because you know me - I have to make a point of making it known I heard him clear as day so he gets the message that he's an idiot. I think he realized what he had said out loud and how it sounded, and just kind of shut up after that.

Now I do understand that I am a mother of girls only. But I DO know for a fact that neither my husband or myself would ever talk down to our son (if we had one). I mean c'mon get off the macho track already!! I know, I know - there is social expectations of gender roles and people have a hard time getting away from that. But still, I don't think he was doing his kid any favours with his comment. I was tempted to tell Jenna when she got hit in the face with a ball to shrug it off, be tough and don't act like a boy. LOL you know, just because I like being an arsehole once in a while. I think it was sad that this guy just didn't let his kids enjoy themselves. How could they with their dad giving them so much grief?

OHHHH before I forget, I did send MamaLee, Catwoman their interview questions on email, and will get out the rest of my interviews today so be on the lookout!!!