A LETTER TO A MR. DENNIS LEARY

Imagine my disgust when I had this quote from Dennis Leary pop up in front of me on my computer this afternoon. Apparently he thinks he is well-educated and informed about Autism, as he had this moronic thing to say about the Autism crisis...

"There is a huge boom in autism right now because inattentive mothers and competitive dads want an explanation for why their dumb-ass kids can't compete academically, so they throw money into the happy laps of shrinks . . . to get back diagnoses that help explain away the deficiencies of their junior morons. I don't give a [bleep] what these crackerjack whack jobs tell you - yer kid is NOT autistic. He's just stupid. Or lazy. Or both."

Of course I do have something to say in regards to his statement:

Dear Mr. Leary,

Your complete lack of scruples and intelligence would imply that YOU are the one that is just plain stupid, lazy or both. Stupid for saying that inattentive mothers are the reason why children are being diagnosed with Autism. Lazy for not educating yourself on the realities of Autism. And both for the obvious reasons previously stated.

To make such a broad, ridiculous statement only shows that you are nothing more than another uneducated, loud-mouthed, ignorant jack-ass this world doesn't need. Your over-generalization of the trials a parent with an autistic child goes through is nothing short of insulting. You think this crisis is just something we are making up in our heads? You try living a day in my shoes, and then have the balls to tell me to my face that this isn't real and isn't something thousands upon thousands of people are living with every day.

Don't YOU ever tell me the reason my child is diagnosed with Autism is because I'm lazy, or just looking for a label to blame all my child's problems on. YOU weren't there when she lost her speech at the age of 16 months. YOU weren't there when she withdrew into herself. YOU weren't there to experience my child incapable of interacting with her sisters and parents because of a disorder that is REAL and ripped our hearts in two. YOU weren't there through years and years of intensive therapies trying to help my child. Where the hell do you get off minimizing the pain and the hurt that parents go through every day when they hear that their child has a disability they will have to fight against every single day? Children who have to fight against ignorance likes yours, because you are minimizing something that is real, and they have to live with every single day?

YOU are the reason there is so much ignorance is society about Autism. PEOPLE LIKE YOU are the reason that parents have to fight for their children every day to be treated like equals. Children with Autism are NOT dummies, morons, or anything else you so eloquently described. The fact that you aren't even educated in Autism or anything relatively close to it is laughable. You are so full of yourself that you can honestly think you can un-diagnose children living with Autism? The fact that you think you are an authority on the subject tells me the only one here with mental problems is YOU!

Do humanity a favor and stick to acting. Pretending to be someone you aren't is a lot better than you opening your mouth and showing us who you really are.

DISECTING THE SECTION

I am now officially at my mid-point in this pregnancy, which is 19 weeks. For me, this is mid-point as I'm going to have a repeat scheduled c-section at 38 weeks. I've had two previous. The first one was with the twins (which wasn't something we planned). They were both head down and Kierra was engaged. Apparently my cervix doesn't like to dilate past 8 cm's at any given time. Even when you are 38 weeks pregnant... with twins... and being induced. I won't complain I guess since I was so afraid of pre-term labor with them. I guess my cervix doesn't like to let them out. There are worse things in the world. Like going through 38+ hours of induced labor only to have a c-section I could have scheduled as elective in the first place and saved myself the hassle of the whole ordeal. That being said, I had beautiful twin girls that tipped the scales at 13 lbs together!! Healthy babies!

Karis was elective as well to a point. I was planning on trying to Vbac until I felt that there was something not sitting right with me. Call it mother's intuition, that nagging feeling that something bad was going to happen. I finally opted for the elective repeat c-section, and gave birth to a 7lb'er at 38 weeks. Not only was it a good decision, it may have saved me and the baby as my c-section scar on my uterus was alarmingly thin. My doctor told me the c-section was definitely the way to go, because I was a prime candidate for a uterine rupture (something you love to hear as they dig around in your uterus). Apparently having twins and then another 19 months apart isn't a good idea. Therefore I was instructed that any further babies I should have, should wait for at least 2 years, and that there was only one more pregnancy allowed. This was fine by me... three babies under the age of 19 months was more than I needed at the time!

So here we are again. I have never really sat and worried about c-sections. The first time I had like 20 minutes to wrap my head around it. It was "you need a c-section" to pulling out two babies. Karis I felt okay about, and didn't fret until the night before. Funny story: I crawled into bed with my mom, who had come down for the occasion, at around 4am. She asked me what was wrong, and I said I was nervous. We had to be up by 5am and at the hospital by 6am. She sleepily went to rub my belly, and instead started to rub my right boob. I said "Um mom, I love you but not that much"... and we both started to laugh our asses off. So yes I was nervous but never really dwelled on it. Maybe I was too busy with the twins as well. Well my sister recently had a baby via c-section and has nicely gone on and on about how crappy it was (it was her 4th baby/3rd section). Proceeded to tell me this was the worst one for pain. So now I'm thinking about it. And I still have 19 weeks left!! How crappy is that?

I'm mostly worried about my chronic puking condition I seem to get during c-sections. The twins I had severe vertigo and vomiting for about 2 days. With Karis I was fine until they wheeled me into recovery, and then I proceeded to vomit for about 16 hours. Not too fun especially when you haven't eaten anything for over 12 hours before the surgery, and you are just dry-heaving bile. So I worry about that. And let's face it: no one likes to be sliced open, even if it's for a cute little baby!

So I basically would LOVE to hear any antidotes about how repeat c-sections any of you may have had went better than the ones before. Seriously now, let's share!! Don't plague me with sagas though of how shitty yours was. While I'd love to hear about it at a later time... not so much right now!