Thursday, May 17, 2007

THERE WAS AN OLD WOMAN...


When I Am an Old Woman

Jersey Mum tagged me with this meme. I thought this one was different. My great-grandmother passed away 3 years ago at 101. She was spunky to the end. My grandma's are both in their 80's and still have their wits about them. They've all had interesting lives. We have a long line of longevity in our families... so that's a lot of years of cool talks (and some strange ones as well).

When I am an old woman, I hope to:

A) Still have my mind. I don't want to be one of those senile old ladies that drives everyone bonkers. Plus it would be nice to recollect people I know, or think fondly on old memories. And I don't want to walk out of the nursing home wearing my bra for a top.

B) Have family who will still talk and visit with me. I have this fear that people will not visit me and I'll be alone. LOL you know how it is; people get tired of you and don't really want to visit you. I don't want to be sitting there everyday staring out of a window watching birds and wondering if my family remembered I turned 103 today.

C) Have bladder control. LOL seriously - I don't want to be pissing myself! Besides, sometimes those nursing homes aren't all that good about keeping you clean. All I ask is the ability to sit on the toilet and go by myself.


When I am an old woman, I will not:

A) Come up with strange ideas about digestion, how to take medication etc... that make no logical sense and makes my family roll their eyes all the time. I will not act like medical science hasn't evolved and that using leeches to drain the evil from my boy is an acceptable practice.

B) Recycle presents from things in my own home. I know people that do this; it's just not right. If all else fails, grandma will give out cash. No one will receive one of my salt and pepper shakers, or a sweater from 1990 that I wore in high school. Although being vintage - that actually might be a cool gift.

C) Drive like I own the road just because I'm older. I hate it when old people insist that they've put in their time so they can drive any way they want. They say teens drive crazy... HA I've been on the road with the old folks! I also refuse to fart in public and act like it wasn't me. That always throws me for a loop. I mean we're standing right there. Do we really not notice this?

OK so I'm supposed to tag some people. I guess I'm going to tag MamaLee, Janis, and Maria. And anyone else that wants to play, play along!

4 comments:

MamaLee said...

Yay, something to do AGE! Getting OLD! BEING old. LOL

Thanks for the tag, kiddo, and great post!

Wearing your bra for a top...HA!

Dustanne said...

This is hilarious...an old friend of mine's grandma, everytime she gets up from the couch and walks away she farts like crazy....lol

Love the answers!!!!

Maria said...

I'll get right on it...and you know..I just love that song that is playing today....ah..memory lane again, but I PROMISE that I'm not bawling.

Such great answers...and like Lee, I LOVE it that is about AGE. I can get there from here.

Jenny said...

That was really funny! Glad to hear you'll still be in your right mind and firmly in control of you bladder.

And what is it with old ladies and farting? If they're not doing it, they're telling a story about doing it! Adding that to my list - I also vow not to tell stories about my sphincter laxity. :)