WHEN MOMS FLASH THE CHANGEROOM

If you see a show on FOX about mom's that flash in change rooms, and there is this woman wearing hot pink panties with two small children screaming - that's me!!!

I decided to surprise Jarrett and I bought tickets to the opera "Carmen" for this Sunday. He's never been to one and has always wanted to check one out. I was delighted to find great seats in the balcony!!!! I did pay a premium for the seats, but I figure if you are going to try out opera, you might as well do it right. He was pretty excited about it, as I was. How often do you have an excuse to get dolled up and go out for a nice evening?

Therefore... I needed to buy myself a gown. Now I have gowns and stuff, but they are all summery. Plus I didn't feel like digging around the wardrobe box in the basement trying to find them. The last time I wore them was on our Caribbean cruise in 2005. Oh who am I kidding, I probably am a size too big right now to fit into them. Damn you Tim Horton's timbits! I not so graciously admit that since I stopped running, things haven't been as firm. I promise myself I will start again. I bought the treadmill and the new Nikes. Don't pressure me!!!! So finally I had a moment to go shopping with Karis and Jenna. Kierra has specialized services at school on Friday, so Jenna stays home that day. I figure I can hop over to the mall, peruse the dresses, and hopefully find one.

We get to the mall, and I bribe the girls with the promise of Dairy Queen cones if they behave themselves in the store. Nothing like a treat to get immediate behavior. Jenna is having a field day looking at all these dresses. She keeps running to every one imaginable asking me if this was a nice one (um no, I don't think mommy is looking for something that a 17 year old girl would wear). I pick out about 8 of them and head for the change rooms. Now in this particular store, there are no doors on the change rooms, just these heavy curtains. First off, why no doors? Second, don't they see the potential hazards of not having more than a piece of fabric separating patrons and waiting husbands?

Jenna and Karis owed and awed over the dresses. Apparently I looked like Cinderella in all of them. Every once in a while, I would traipse out to see myself in the three way mirror, just to get a full appreciation of what I look like from all angles. At about the sixth dress, Jenna exclaims, "mommy why are your boobies showing? You have pink boobies." (Took off bra to try on strapless gowns). I told her to hush, and that was impolite. I knew full well people could hear her in the adjoining rooms. They were probably laughing; and they were probably smarter than me for not bringing their kids to the store with them. Then Jenna proceeded to comment about my bum showing, and basically wouldn't shut up about it. When I tried on the seventh dress, Jenna gets this ingenious idea to open the curtain. Here I am, bra less and wearing underwear that mostly resemble dental floss!!! I quickly grabbed the curtain and pulled it shut. A woman and her daughter got a good show I'm sure. Lord!!!! I accidentally yelled something like, "Why did you do that? Don't you use your brain?" Nice I know - but remember I just showed two women my nipples ok? I decided on a black dress, and got dressed quickly, deciding to show the back end to the curtain in case there was a repeat unveiling.

At the counter, the saleslady rung up my purchase, and then commented on how lovely my children were and how well behaved!! I just about died laughing. I hardly think she'd agree if she was just giving a free peepshow in the backroom. Hopefully there aren't any cameras in that store. I'm sure I'll be downloadable on the internet in a few days if there are!