Thursday, April 19, 2007


My husband is one of those aggrivating people who claims he NEVER has dreams. I constantly correct him and tell him everyone has dreams, it's just whether or not you remember them. Typically, you have to awaken from a dream to remember it, otherwise it get's lost in the shuffle of dreamland. Interesting fact: the average person will have had four to seven dreams in one night. So add em all up, and that's about six years of constant dream sleep total! Besides his denial, he also talks a lot in his sleep as well. This man is the most BORING sleep talker imaginable. He dreams about work - I kid you not!!!! He'll talk like he's on the phone on a business meeting. He talks about acquisitions and mergers. I have to admit something - I mess with him. I'll say things like "The deal isn't going through, we'll lose millions!" and he literally gets stressed out in his sleep. You might think I'm a big meanie, but the man also snores like a buzzsaw, so I think if he's mumbling about business, or his adnoids are rattling around like a penny in a tin can, I can enjoy a few moments of mucking with him. In university, he'd dream about exams. He once told me some engineering theory, but substituted sheep into the equation. That was different. Then again, this is coming from a gal who once freaked out because she thought squirrels were eatting the molding around the closet doors.

Now me, I dream!!! And they are messed up! Last week I had a dream about a colony of vampires that were trying to convert me because they wanted a pregnant vampire. First off, I'm not pregnant so that makes no sense. Second, I went to the ballet "Dracula" last week, hence the vampire dream. And third, I'm part Romanian so isn't that a little funny? I almost always remember my dreams (probably because hubby wakes me up talking about stock options or making his ogre snore racket). So imagine my shock when hubby told me he was up at 5:00 and couldn't go back to sleep because he had a dream! Will wonders ever cease? But then he goes on how disturbing his dream was, so disturbing he couldn't fall back asleep. I jokingly thought to myself, "He must've gotten fired" but then he tells me it was about the kids. Now I'm serious. I hate having bad dreams about the girls; especially when you first wake up and have to convince yourself it's not real. Anyways, he doesn't want to tell me about it at first. I'm thinking it must be really bad. I convince him to tell me so he divulges his horrible dream.... ready?

He shot the kids out of a cannon; more precisely Kierra and Karis.

I started to laugh!!!! I mean I thought it was something horrible like a car accident or fire or something. You know? I mean I once had a dream of trying to save all three from drowning - and no one would help me. And my husband is getting bent out of shape out of loading the kids into an oversized cannon and making them the flying gambeenies. He was really upset I was laughing at him, asking me why he'd dream something so crazy. I had to reassure him he really, in fact, didn't want to fire the kids from a cannon (although some days...). I told him maybe he secretly wanted to see the circus or something. It was amazing he was so serious about it. I told him dreams seldomly mean what they present at face value. You need to dig a little deeper than that. After all; we are dealing with our subconscious here. Never know what that crazy bugger is going to come up with.

All in all, I suppose he's better off not remembering what he actually dreams about. I mean seriously; if it's that disturbing to him. I wouldn't want him to start having phobias about cannons. Why we may never be able to go to a civil war re-enactment, or go to the circus. And me? Well I'm content to remember, even if I'm being hunted by vampires or pushing the kids in the grocery store in a wheelbarrow. I try not to take what I dream TOO seriously you know.


Sandi said...

I am always dreaming that I need to call 911 and it won't go through and when it does they won't answer! what is that all about? LOL
your dreams are much more exciting..

Lene said...

The flying gambinis...LOVE that! lol

Dreams are so strange. When I have a dream that I remember, I always wonder what the heck it meant. In the moment,they make so much sense.

Janet a.k.a. "Wonder Mom" said...

What do you expect when it was hos first dream EVA! Of course he'd get upset you were laughing...*snort* *giggle*

TK said...

I once dreamed that my husband died of a brain anorisim(pardon spelling). At the time, I didn't even really know what that was but I freaked. And of course, hubby was still at work when I woke up. Dreams suck! LOL

Slick said...

If you wake up and find him with a big plastic round ball for a nose and a multi colored wig, call the authorities.


I can't believe you stress him out even in his sleep!!

Janis said...

LMAO ELLE!! Your blog just CRACKS me up every freakin MORNING!!! YOU ROCK!!!

Now this vampire you get to "do" the head vampire and does he resemble Brad Pitt at all?? I could easily be converted to your coven..hehe